There comes a point where paths don’t merely cross, they collide.

New Orleans is one of those collision points.  It’s where the French and Spanish collided in the Rebellion of 1768.  It’s where slaves collided with slave owners in the 1811 German Coast Uprising, the largest slave rebellion in U.S. history. It’s where natural gas resources, the railroad and the cotton press collided with the local economy.  It’s where immigrants from France, Germany, Spain, Haiti, and Cuba collided with the American and Native American inhabitants to create a unique and highly diversified culture. And it’s where, in 2005, Hurricane Katrina collided with the vibrant city, resulting in an estimated $100 billion in economic losses.

It was in this city of color and chaos that our road trip enjoyed a short respite.  Our own paths were colliding inside the tiny Corolla: no one liked my Richard Castle audiobook so I could only listen when everyone else slept. David’s long legs limited the time he spent in the back seat, much to the annoyance of his shorter siblings.  Liam’s snoring prevented the others from sleeping and was loud enough to interfere with any audiobook enjoyment. The bickering over radio stations, snack stops and the best character in the NightWing universe was escalating.  It was time for some space and a little non-driving adventure.  New Orleans, city of collisions, seemed as good a place as any for a breather.

Other paths crossed in New Orleans.  The kind of paths we navigate every day, no matter where we are.  After four days of vagabond adventure, it was time for the ones I had crossly pushed aside in the name of the vacation and family path. The Work-Me path was wondering when I’d finally respond to the 200+ inquiries piling up in my inbox about the projects on hold. The Friend-Me path was wondering when I’d be online again and back for the regular chats and IMs. The Household-Me path reminded me that two bills still needed to be paid and that I ought to check in with the cat sitter. And the Personal-Me Path?  The Personal-Me path wondered when I would run again and get back to reading my Joyce Carol Oates novel.

How many paths criss-cross your world? Two things struck me as I sat down to confront all my colliding paths. First, it’s exhausting. Juggling, multi-tasking, call it what you will.  It’s really just a lot of competing priorities demanding your time and energy.  And it doesn’t really matter which path you choose to focus on first, or how you attempt to combine and consolidate. It’s a lot of work and it leaves you drained.  Second, the one path that can help revitalize us and empower us to better manage the other competing paths is indeed that one less traveled by.  It’s the first path we push aside. It’s the Personal-Me path that give us the space to recharge, to think, and to bring our best possible selves to all our other paths.

Sure, it’s cliche to say you have to build in personal time, you need to treat yourself to something just for you.  We push this path aside first because it’s everyone else’s paths that demand our attention.  We prioritize the needs of our family, friends and coworkers over our personal needs because it’s easier to justify doing something, anything, for someone else rather than indulging what we perceive to be a selfish act.

But it’s not indulgence. It’s care. When the Personal-Me path is left untended, it gets overgrown and hard to find again.  The journey back to it can arduous.  It becomes a tangled, weedy mess that collides with the other paths you are fighting so hard to cultivate and manage.  It starts to spread its hungry, choking vines around your other paths, inhibiting your ability to keep them clear.

If we let the Personal-Me path remain the one less traveled by, it does indeed make all the difference.